Recently, I had a little epiphany about a bad habit I've had over the years. Too often during things I enjoy, I find myself counting the days, hours, minutes left until that good thing must end. While my brain seems to just be taking stock of how much left enjoyment I get to experience, it can be a real downer on the actual experience by taking me away from the fun. I got to see Ellie Goulding with a friend the other night (Ellie was AMAZING), and on the way there, I realized that I had accidentally left my memory card out of my camera. In the age of smartphones and their advanced cameras, this should have been no big deal, but I am a hoarder and my poor 8G just doesn't have all the memory space I require. So, I tried to open up a bit of space on my phone, and went into the concert with the knowledge that each snap would have to count. With that in mind, I went into the show doing my usual act of capturing every move the performer makes. A few songs in though, as my camera began to fill up, I realized that I wasn't as focused on this music that I loved, as I was on recording the experience to share with others and enjoy later on.
Ironically, I discovered later that night that the videos I recorded were actually at very odd spots in songs and thus were not very useful. However, I was not unhappy with this result. Why? Because, once I realized that I was focusing so much on snapping pictures or quality videos, I put my phone into my pocket, buttoned the flap over top, and set about enjoying the concert and the environment around me. I have to say, the crowd was great, Ellie was an amazing performer, and I had a great experience that I can remember well, all the way through! It was only after putting away the technology and focusing on the event at hand that I began to really enjoy the show. I can remember many such occurances, be they concerts, vacations, parties, etc. where I wasted time that I could have been enjoying on focusing on how much longer I had to enjoy the experience--which of course takes the joy out of it, at least for me.
My absolute favorite book about life in general which literally helped shape the way I think about many things is The Razor's Edge by W. Somerset Maugham. In this book (which I recommend everyone should read), there is a quote which spoke to me, and stuck with me, ever since I first read the book a couple years ago.
"'But endless duration makes good no better, nor white any whiter. If the
rose at noon has lost the beauty it had at dawn, the beauty it had then
was real. Nothing in the world is permanent, and we’re foolish when we
ask anything to last, but surely we’re still more foolish not to take
delight in it while we have it.'"-W. Somerset Maugham
I have carried this quote with me for a long time, but apparently never fully submitted to its truth. What is the point in acquiring good things if we won't enjoy them? In the past, I have been afraid of good moments turning into only memories. I feared losing this thing which was momentarily brought within my grasp. But honestly, as the quote denotes, there is no point in trying to hold on to something transitory, like a moment. Wasting time focusing on trying to prolong a moment makes no sense at all, when you think about it. So, enjoy this moment, this second. Not because it will soon be gone, but because it was given to you, and why not be happy at least with that?
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
The New Year
It makes me happy that, each year, we still find it possible to find the changing of a clock hand so exciting, and still hold on to the hope that, this year, things will change for the better.
I know that, until now, I've mostly used this blog as an outlet for my frustration with various things, but it has also been a place that I tried to let that all out, and then stay hopeful for a positive change in the future. And for at least this one more post, the same is upon us. Cue anecdote. At the end of my first semester of college, I felt frustrated, burned out, and like I had moved no where at all. However, some different words from a family member finally helped me see the benefit of this semester. While chatting about my most personally disliked class this semester (biology), instead of asking me if I knew what my plans for the future were and what I wanted to do, he asked, "Well, did you figure out what you don't want to do?" All of a sudden, I realized that this semester was productive at least in that I realized that I need to make a change in my life, and that not everything I try will be something I like or what is right for me. So with that, I got to thinking.
Now, maybe a week later, I have realized that, as literally all of my best friends and my sisters have been saying for actual months, I need to get out of my current Environmental Studies major, and into one which actually suits me, probably in either Creative Writing, Journalism, or Spanish, and perhaps minor in a science that I enjoy (perhaps leading up to one day fulfilling my dream of writing/photographing for National Geographic Magazine). My dad, the extreme "realist" that he is, quickly wished me luck in ever finding work with a Creative Writing degree. This is hard to hear of course, especially since it took me a lot of courage to decide in myself to veer away from the sciences, but as my little sister reminded me today, I need to become better at hearing and appreciating others' opinions, but only using those which are beneficial to me and what I actually want.
And, funny enough, today I logged onto my school email for the first time in a while, only to find an email about my interest in the Creative Writing major (it was my second choice on my application) and encouraging me to attend a Creative Writing class in order to learn about the course and give my information for possibly joining the major in the future.
I can take a hint. ;)
So, with that on my mind, going back to school doesn't seem so daunting, and neither do the remaining 4ish years of my university education. Just like other years, I'm starting this one with quite a bit of hope, but also with a new brightness along that far-off horizon, and I hope you are as well. I hope that 2013 is the year that you, as well as I, finally do that thing--that one thing--that has haunted the back of your mind for many a non-January-1st-day. Go on that trip. Talk to that person. Lose that weight. Take up that hobby. Realize that dream.
Whatever your resolution, I wish you the best of luck. Here's to a good year. Happy 2013!
I know that, until now, I've mostly used this blog as an outlet for my frustration with various things, but it has also been a place that I tried to let that all out, and then stay hopeful for a positive change in the future. And for at least this one more post, the same is upon us. Cue anecdote. At the end of my first semester of college, I felt frustrated, burned out, and like I had moved no where at all. However, some different words from a family member finally helped me see the benefit of this semester. While chatting about my most personally disliked class this semester (biology), instead of asking me if I knew what my plans for the future were and what I wanted to do, he asked, "Well, did you figure out what you don't want to do?" All of a sudden, I realized that this semester was productive at least in that I realized that I need to make a change in my life, and that not everything I try will be something I like or what is right for me. So with that, I got to thinking.
Now, maybe a week later, I have realized that, as literally all of my best friends and my sisters have been saying for actual months, I need to get out of my current Environmental Studies major, and into one which actually suits me, probably in either Creative Writing, Journalism, or Spanish, and perhaps minor in a science that I enjoy (perhaps leading up to one day fulfilling my dream of writing/photographing for National Geographic Magazine). My dad, the extreme "realist" that he is, quickly wished me luck in ever finding work with a Creative Writing degree. This is hard to hear of course, especially since it took me a lot of courage to decide in myself to veer away from the sciences, but as my little sister reminded me today, I need to become better at hearing and appreciating others' opinions, but only using those which are beneficial to me and what I actually want.
And, funny enough, today I logged onto my school email for the first time in a while, only to find an email about my interest in the Creative Writing major (it was my second choice on my application) and encouraging me to attend a Creative Writing class in order to learn about the course and give my information for possibly joining the major in the future.
I can take a hint. ;)
So, with that on my mind, going back to school doesn't seem so daunting, and neither do the remaining 4ish years of my university education. Just like other years, I'm starting this one with quite a bit of hope, but also with a new brightness along that far-off horizon, and I hope you are as well. I hope that 2013 is the year that you, as well as I, finally do that thing--that one thing--that has haunted the back of your mind for many a non-January-1st-day. Go on that trip. Talk to that person. Lose that weight. Take up that hobby. Realize that dream.
Whatever your resolution, I wish you the best of luck. Here's to a good year. Happy 2013!
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